Zillow thinks I'm a fucking baller and I'm okay with that

Now that I've been living in Denver for a couple of years, I started casually looking around at the real estate market.  The Zillow phone app is a pretty neat way to browse while sitting on your ass at home watching TV.  The prices range from "achievable" to "In your fucking dreams."  I created an account so I could save some condos I had my eye on to see if they're still around in a few months or if the prices drops.  Zillow then emails you some matches daily, needless to say, their algorithm could use some work:

$990K is squarely in the "In your fucking dreams" category.  Not only that, but it's in fucking Greenwood Village, whereas the properties I saved were in my current neighborhood.  You can take your almost $1M house in the fucking burbs and eat a dick.  Though I'd be lying if that $8,500 price break didn't make me think twice about it.

$1.4M?  Yeah, this place sounds like an awesome bachelor pad - too bad I don't play for the Rockies/Avalanche/Broncos/Nuggets.  Why the fuck would Zillow think this is a good match for me?  To be fair, had I won that $750M PowerBall jackpot a few weeks ago, I totally would've bought this place with cash.

In the meantime, I'll keep slumming it and window shopping in the "achievable" category to see if I can take advantage of my VA home loan.