Consider this a PSA: YOU CAN GET A FREE ORDER OF NUGGS at Chick-Fil-A until Jan 31 thru the Chick-Fil-A app. If you do not have the Chick-Fil-A app, you strike me as the type of person who enjoys waiting in lines and wiping your ass with 1-ply toilet paper.
Anyway, here's the interesting thing: You can get free nuggs OR a kale crunch side. What. The. Fuck. If you redeem this reward for a kale crunch side, get fucked. I don't want to know you. You're a fucking psychopath. Could you imagine the following interaction:
Chick-Fil-A cashier: Welcome to Chick-Fil-A, may I take your order?
Psychopath Customer: Yes, I'd like to redeem this reward for a kale crunch side.
CFA cashier: Great. Anything else?
Psychopath Customer: No, that's it.
CFA cashier: GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE AND DON'T COME BACK. But have a nice day while you're at it.
I would love to see the data on how many people redeem this reward for Kale. Would also love to see a heat map of what state people do it in so I know to never take a vacation there. The only way I would possibly find it acceptable to redeem the kale crunch side is if you order two spicy chicken sandwiches and throw away the bun on one of them to make a double decker. That's the only way.
...and in case you're wondering, I redeemed this reward for nuggs like two weeks ago.
